gotosleep_idiot | November & December Test Drive Meme

Of course Television was failing him. River Song defied most normal scenarios simply by being her and if anything, his reactions to her words were rather delightful and entertaining for her.

She might even keep him around for awhile...though sadly, she wasn't a succubus, just a woman who always knows what she wants and tends to get in one way or another.

"Then it's only natural I accept the invitation." For her, that's worth quite a bit.

Women who know what they want and how to get it tend to be the only ones he cares about to give any attention to. Probably because he hasn't the faintest idea what he wants himself.

"You honor me," he temporarily takes both her hands in his, ostensibly to help keep them warm, and moving lightly to dance and walk backwards in front of her.

"Sadly this place has a pretty wide dearth of restaurants too, nothing on New York or even London, but they do have some passable noodle shops. Or pizza that isn't entirely cardboard."

He was the pickiest eater she would ever meet. Part of that never growing up thing.

"Or," he rolled his eyes, "A pub. If you don't mind the lack of intimacy."

Gothdonald's was right out though. Even if she begged.

Then he might possibly falling in love with her and River will laugh if that happens. Then again, it's been awhile since she's had anyone other than The Doctor wrapped around her little finger. It might be fun.

She just smirks as he takes her hands and starts to do this little walking dance in front of her. Admittedly, it was cute in a childish sort of way. Which, River had a feeling he was rather childish and that just made things more entertaining for her.

"I'm particular to the nicer restaurants in London myself, though, nothing beats some of fancier ones you find in the 51st century. I'd highly suggest the one on Darillium." Of course, she might have a very particular fondness for that one.

"Take me to whichever one has the best food and possibly wine."

'In love.' I mean, Jessica straight up told him 'You've never loved anyone in your repulsive life. Kilgrave's form of love isn't really... love as much as deep-seated beyond the deranged obsession. Which not even River could earn as badly as JJ did since as with Kilgrave 'replacing' the Doctor, it would be nigh impossible. Except the Doctor tried a little harder to help River be a better person, and Jessica tried to use Kilgrave's parents to give him a reality check; which just resulted in him torturing and ordering them to kill themselves. Not completely mirrored lives there. River's parents wanted to protect her from the abusive weapon-making, Kilgrave's parents made him the weapon and then powered him up. To save his life arguably (he either doesn't see it that way, or at minimum refuses to give them even that much credit). But still, dysfunctional as hell.

"Fifty-first century?" Arched eyebrows. Had he been here just a week he would have scoffed at that. Now he takes Nautilus' choice in obnoxious song as actual prescience. Go figure.

Food and wine though, already better taste in everything than Jessica -- although hopefully with less drinking to the point of getting sick, AND less temper! -- but while the best of both was undoubtedly the Dream of All Blue, there's no way KG's going anywhere near there.

"Good, then you won't mind that robots do all the serving and automation." He actually hesitantly rubs the back of his neck. There is decent Italian... ish. But the robots make him nervous. Really anything out of his control tends to make him nervous -- but that is everything in Nautilus.

Messed up, dysfunctional and deranged. Their lives may have been similar, but the key differences were definitely noticeable... And that still didn't stop River from wanting to string him along for her own amusement. Kilgrave really has no idea what he's in for with her.

"Time travel is a wonderful thing and something I have a lot of experience with." She's been doing it her entire life.

Thankfully for him, River was very hard to get drunk and tended to not let herself go that far. It's only fun drinking someone under the table once or twice. Any more than that and it gets boring. However, if he ever found the right buttons, her temper was something that he might not survive, unless he could out run bullets if she ever got her hands on a gun.

"There's nothing wrong with robot servers." Obviously that didn't make her nervous in the slightest. Though, she was curious as to why it made him nervous. "Just so long as I have good company with me."

No no, he'd still enjoy that. Being used instead of being the user would still make him feel weirdly in control. Especially because of the contrast to how she is with the Doctor.

"Really," it sounds sarcastic and skeptical, and he can't help it. But this place is sort of time travel-y except... "Well, you're basically stuck here. Anyone who tells you, that you can go right back, is a liar." A quick eye roll. "Technically they say it's difficult if you have doubts about the reality of this place but..." he gestured with his hands. "Cultism. Scientology sounding to the Nth degree. I keep expecting Tom Cruise to jump out on people's couches and sofas." He was rather proud of that reference, although if she really was a time traveler, she might have no idea what it meant.

And Kilgrave always has shooty McAssassin ladies after him. Even in Nautilus, the first woman he freaked out to nearly shoot-on-sight levels was Kirika who literally was an assassin and one of the Doctor's 'daughters.' So.... there's that.

As dumb as it is, her latter suggestion warms him inside out. He KNOWS it's a line, he knows she probably literally doesn't mean HIM, but even that much kindness is so foreign to him, he genuinely enjoys it. So he ends up giving her a kind of dopey puppy dog smile, rubbing his thumbs over the top of her hands. "I'll endeavor to be just that."

It's weird. Not having his power. Normally he could just... order her to see him that way.

But he meant it when he told Jessica it was immensely unsatisfying. There was a lot to be said for pulling out the stops to please someone, even if they were thoroughly ungrateful -- as Jessie always was.

They were in for one interesting relationship dynamic, weren't they.

As for his reference, it goes right over her head because she is most definitely a time traveler and secondly, it's most definitely an American reference and she was never much for TV. Why watch the adventure when you could be having it?

Well, River could have been considered an assassin at one point and was a rather good shot even when she wasn't looking. Even if she didn't carry a gun anymore, she still kept her skills sharp just in case. Besides, even without a gun River is still very, very dangerous and clever.

And the moment she sees that dopey smile, she knows she has her hooks in him for good or bad... or until she gets bored. Either way, it will be an interesting experience. "I definitely hope so. Otherwise, I might just have to find someone else to appreciate my talents."

A billion percent, yes.

While Kilgrave was born and err... 'raised' in England -- as much as you can call it that, he only really started watching television when he came into his own and got freed from his parents' lab experiments. Yeah. Except when they let him watch rugby before that, to try to 'inspire' him to be strong and healthy and in their control. It's a thing.

Oh he can tell she's clever, and very strong. And lethal. If anything that's why he's doing all this. Kilgrave is well, none of that. Lethal... but usually his mode of offing people is just telling them to do it to themselves. Or others to do it.

He laughs at the last part, gently murmuring, "Heaven forbid. Unfortunately, you might find a dearth of that here too. Too many superhero teenagers running around." Oh, how he scoffs at that.

Considering her own..."childhood", River...well. Lets just go with the parts she remembers and leave it at that. Either way, it was a strange way to grow up. Who else can say they grew up being their parent's childhood friend.

In other words, he want's a strong, clever and very sexy on his side for protection. That might just be a double edge sword with River around.

"Are there now. Sounds rather annoying... it's more fun to cause the trouble than saving the day."

Kilgrave is all about double-edged swords. But he's never actually had his people used for protection used against him. Even to the point of hiring vast amounts of mercenary and protection agencies. Paranoia pays off.

AND HE BEAMS AT HER. The most genuine non-explicitly evil/creepy smile he's had in.... what feels like ages. Probably since the first time he realized he had more freedom than Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone.

"I quite agree!" he actually laughs at that, softly shaking his head, "No, the best part is later, when the papers are all baffled at how it all happened, or at the police station--" he grins slyly then, quieting himself down. He's paranoid about being recorded, and there's no telling what kind of traps he could be setting himself up for. He leans in wickedly instead, whispering in her ear once more, "Watch them scramble oh-so-fruitlessly, like helpless ants trying to repair their own hills while other chaos happens around them." He pulled back, eyes glittering well evilly, but with clear mirth. "I find the irony almost as delicious as Bucatini all’Amatriciana." He is way too proud of the way he says that.

Then the quicker he realizes she could both protect and kill him the better. Really, there was ever only one man that she would completely listen to and depending which version of him was there....Well. It's debatable whether or not she would listen to the younger versions of The Doctor at this point.

Though, paranoia could be good in small doses. If handled correctly.

As for his reaction to her words, she just keeps on smirking as he talks and honestly, her mind thinks of The Master briefly before brushing that thought away and admittedly, he did have a point. Watching people try and figure out how something happened or even the shock on their face when they realize she got away with some impossible feat... it was quite the wonderful look.

River can't help but chuckle. However where he seemed to be evil, she was more of a chaotic neutral... not so much evil now a days anyway. Thanks to her parents and The Doctor. "It is rather fun to see them scramble. Especially when you pull off something they think is absolutely impossible."

He already has. But that goes for most women. Well less so on the protection thing. But the Dragoon of darkness: Rose already wants to kill him so, there's that. He hasn't completely figured out you can come back from the dead here though. So there's that too.

"Which is everything. No imagination, the lot of them," he scoffed, completely ignoring how long it took him to stop treating Nautilus as a cultist camp that kidnapped him.

As far as River's concerned, Rose is harmless despite what the girl might think.

"Pity. Though that means I can get away with a lot more than I initially thought." And probably in more elaborate ways than usual if she really wanted. Then again....she would still have to be careful. There was no Doctor here that she trusted to catch her if she were to say... dive off of the 50th floor of a building or something insane like that.

No, no, different Rose. The darkness Rose has black hair, armor, and is training a darkness dragon that she used to chase Kilgrave up a tree. And all because he just ~~demanded~~ asked to be let inside!

"It's... different here," Kilgrave admitted rather ruefully. "Imagination is the least of the problems." Insanity was a bigger one in general, he felt.

Somehow, that sounds like a Rose she could get along with.

"Oh? Then what do you think the biggest problem is?" If he says insanity to her, she will laugh. River married arguably one of the most insane men in the whole universe and one could argue that she was hardly what one could call completely sane herself...

Yeah, no one gets along with that Rose, so good luck? Then again, Kilgrave doesn't know that she's thousands of years old and that's just River's thiiiing.

He answers blandly: "Insanity."

Laugh away.

He'll learn soon enough.

And as stated, once he explained what he thought the problem was, she paused and started laughing. If that was the biggest problem here, then she was right at home!

When she finally looked back at him after her laughter died down, there was a wicked mischievous glint in her eyes that spoke of her welcoming the challenge that something like insanity brought.

"Is that all?"

Another eyeroll. He isn't sure he's being laughed at, or if she's laughing at the situation. He doesn't like being laughed at, but it doesn't seem like she's not taking him seriously as much as the place, and in which case... Kilgrave couldn't care less.

"Did you just escape from a mental asylum recently?"

"Hardly. My life has been nothing but one strange, insane adventure after another. If insanity is the only thing you consider the biggest problem here, then I'll feel right at home."

She gave him a playful smirk. No, she wasn't laughing at him to be exact. She was definitely laughing at the place and situation. Besides, she loves a good challenge. To prove she wasn't laughing at him, she leans in and kisses his cheek, still with her ever present smirk.

"Besides, if this place is really that insane, then all the more reason to have an interesting companion around."

Kyaaaaaa a cheek kiss, dokidoki!

And to think he didn't even order it, or suggest it. What a weird glorious day this turned out to be.

He grins slyly at her response, but shakes his head all the same, "I'm not sure adventure is the right word for this place. Torture, maybe." He's dramatically exaggerating. Also hates it more than everyone else on account of not having his ability to control everything and everyone and anyone so.... ymmv.

"Although, as you said, you don't mind robots so... there's a spa in the south as well, interested in going? After food, of course I mean. I haven't been yet so I can't verify it for you, beyond it being robot-run," he said in his usual clipping accent and tone.

Obviously their ideas on tortured varied. Her idea of torture was...well, definitely not physical to say the least. Physical torture she was very good at dealing with.

"Torture implies whips and chains with the possibility of handcuffs. If that's the case, then I'm sure I'll enjoy that too." What can she say? River was impossible to displease with supposedly bad circumstances. They always worked out in the end. Most of the time.

"It almost sounds like you're asking me out on a date." Which alone amuses her. "And we only just met, easy tiger. You might just bite off more than you can chew with a girl like me."

"No no, that would be fun," he dismissed her worry about physical torture, and perked right up when she said she'd enjoy it. She had to be lying. But damn, wouldn't finding out be fun? In fact, he's so distracted with those thoughts, he completely forgot to explain about what he meant by tortures. Then again, he wasn't good at explaining himself in general usually given how infrequently it was ever useful to him and more just a nuisance.

"Oh," dark eyes glittered mischievously, "You'd be amazed at my appetite."

River lived to be distracting. Now the question was, whether she would let him find out if she was lying or telling the truth.

"Will I?" she smirked and there was definitely a look of amusement and mischievousness in her own eyes. "Then I guess we'll find out whether you're out of your league or not." River already knew the answer. He was and it'll be interesting to see just when he realized just how far out of his league she really was.

"Well, I know you're out of my league," See? See???? He could be smooth. And complimentary. And honest. ISH. "But as I said, I'm willing to make the attempt to level up, as it were."

That got a gentle laugh from her. At least he was aware of that. "Then lets see if you can manage to get to the level of my standards."

...Which either meant he needed to be useful to her in someway, or,be the Doctor which he most certainly was not. So, he better hope for useful.

November & December Test Drive Meme

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Massive Jessica Jones spoilers \:|/

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