gotosleep_idiot | November & December Test Drive Meme

In other words, a brattier, slightly more dangerous version of a certain idiot she married. Only, without the survivors guilt complex and the permanent need to save everyone.

"That depends, how's the gravity." She was already smirking. Even if his abilities didn't work in this place, he'd find River near impossible to control. When you've been brainwashed most of your life, you tend to get a resistance to things like that.

"As for my other lovely talents, you might just have to wait and see. I'm not about to give you spoilers when it comes to surprises."

Also borderline evil. At minimum without any sense of a moral compass beyond self-preservation and a basic understanding of consequences. Even if it was gleaned from watching television.

"Supposedly the gravity here is an illusion created by the willpower of Nautilus itself," he gently toed an expensive-looking shoe into the snowy ground, "And inauthentic." He popped his tongue in the side of his cheek. Of course, under that principle, so was cold, but as stubborn as Kilgrave was, he couldn't actually convince himself that normal things like day, night, sleep, food, were all imaginary constructs based on familiarity and willpower, not as tangible as they were.

"I can't jump as well as the spiders yet," his dark eyes glittered, "But I'll get there." And then punish them.

Kilgrave didn't want to control River -- not yet anyway, and not so directly ever. Much more satisfying to be mutually entertaining each other, after all.

He grinned slyly at her final response, "That's all right," he intimated wickedly, "I can already imagine quite a lot."

In that they might be similarly matched. River's moral compass has always been...questionable at best. She's gotten better over the years, but, it was still slightly questionable unless it came to The Doctor. He was the man she loved and would do anything for.

"Sounds like someone's playing god." Or they were on a living spaceship. That was always a possibility to. But, if this was a nexus of worlds, River doubted normal rules applied.

Despite that, she was watching K.G. out of the corner of her eye and noting the looks. "You don't have to jump to get the spiders. I'd imagine luring them into a trap would work just as well. I find that applying fire or at the very least gunfire works marvelously on things like that."

If it can be killed, River will find a way.

"Can you? Then perhaps you can tell me just what you're imagining and I can tell you whether you're close." She miight... just be grinning a little wickedly and a little curious.

"So you can see why I thought I fell into a cultist camp at first, yes?"

At her suggestion of fire and a trap -- he laughed, startled, but genuine. "Ohhhh I like you. Yeah!" He rubbed the scruffy chin with his free hand in thought. He could use that cola-bastards explosion trap. Or just basic bomb explosions 101. He's good at traps. "That could definitely work well." He'd been more fixated on how easily the swordsman handled them, but why not blow them up?

Spoilers River, if you go around blowing up and shooting the spiders, the Doctors: all 4 of him (so far) will get very upset. Not that Kilgrave cares, of course.

"Shame you missed the reindeer, they were quite cute. Except for their biting." Dark expression.

It fades completely, however, as he focuses his attention back on her, very gently brushing fingertips over her shoulder tops. "Gymnastics, for starters," he whispered in her ear, aiming to make her skin prick and not from the cold. "You look very good being so flexible. I bet you could even surprise yourself with how limber you are."

Somehow, she's amused he didn't think of the trap idea before now. That would have been her first attempt to get rid of them. And if that didn't work, she was sure she could think of even more devious plans that would.

"Do you now. Then I guess you'll like a few more of my other destructive ideas if they're needed." And not used against anyone she actually cares about. Though, if The Doctors get upset, she's rather sure she can deal with them easily. It's not like she hasn't upset him before anyway.

At the feel of the fingertips and him whispering in her ear, she can't help but feel a small shiver race through her even if she didn't show any outward signs of it.

"Oh I already know how limber I am. The real question should be whether you'll get to find out or not."

Get rid of... oh River. They'll be back. He just wants to punish them. Like an obnoxious child ripping wings off of flies.

"Always," he grins about the destructive ideas.

And he laughs all over again at the last part, raising her hand to kiss the top of it, dark eyes looking into hers coyly. "I look forward to earning the view more properly then." It's weird to him how... honest that is too! He's never had to REALLY try hard to get something he wanted at least, not since he was a child, but it's true, the biggest draw for him to Jessica was how much he couldn't just order her around.

Then he was in for a real treat with River considering she almost never let people order her around unless they were The Doctor. Even then, it would have to be the right version of him or she might not listen completely.

"Then lets see if you can manage to earn it. I don't just show anyone how limber I can be. Even if they are handsome and well dressed."

Yup, just steal his heart out, and eat it. Just try not to break his neck. It'd be less fun the second time around.

He laughed again at that. "I'm sure I'll manage, I'm not without my own hidden talents." And how.

Don't tempt her, she just might steal his heart just to make him her plaything depending on how useful he is to her.

"Oh? Then perhaps we need to do a little show and tell sometime. Preferably in private and away from prying eyes." or ears.

The most useful. He'd enjoy the sheer twist and irony on his normal life.

And now she's got his blood racing.

He needs to say something other than Yes yes yes yes! A billion times yes!

This is literally such a new situation to him, he's at a loss for words.

What would television say?

Television is failing him.

She could literally be a succubus planning to eat out his soul and in this place, he'd enjoy it.

"That'd be... exquisite. Though I feel only natural, I should at least do my best, to ply you with food and drink first."

It's not smooth, but it's surprisingly heart-felt. For whatever that's worth.

Of course Television was failing him. River Song defied most normal scenarios simply by being her and if anything, his reactions to her words were rather delightful and entertaining for her.

She might even keep him around for awhile...though sadly, she wasn't a succubus, just a woman who always knows what she wants and tends to get in one way or another.

"Then it's only natural I accept the invitation." For her, that's worth quite a bit.

Women who know what they want and how to get it tend to be the only ones he cares about to give any attention to. Probably because he hasn't the faintest idea what he wants himself.

"You honor me," he temporarily takes both her hands in his, ostensibly to help keep them warm, and moving lightly to dance and walk backwards in front of her.

"Sadly this place has a pretty wide dearth of restaurants too, nothing on New York or even London, but they do have some passable noodle shops. Or pizza that isn't entirely cardboard."

He was the pickiest eater she would ever meet. Part of that never growing up thing.

"Or," he rolled his eyes, "A pub. If you don't mind the lack of intimacy."

Gothdonald's was right out though. Even if she begged.

Then he might possibly falling in love with her and River will laugh if that happens. Then again, it's been awhile since she's had anyone other than The Doctor wrapped around her little finger. It might be fun.

She just smirks as he takes her hands and starts to do this little walking dance in front of her. Admittedly, it was cute in a childish sort of way. Which, River had a feeling he was rather childish and that just made things more entertaining for her.

"I'm particular to the nicer restaurants in London myself, though, nothing beats some of fancier ones you find in the 51st century. I'd highly suggest the one on Darillium." Of course, she might have a very particular fondness for that one.

"Take me to whichever one has the best food and possibly wine."

'In love.' I mean, Jessica straight up told him 'You've never loved anyone in your repulsive life. Kilgrave's form of love isn't really... love as much as deep-seated beyond the deranged obsession. Which not even River could earn as badly as JJ did since as with Kilgrave 'replacing' the Doctor, it would be nigh impossible. Except the Doctor tried a little harder to help River be a better person, and Jessica tried to use Kilgrave's parents to give him a reality check; which just resulted in him torturing and ordering them to kill themselves. Not completely mirrored lives there. River's parents wanted to protect her from the abusive weapon-making, Kilgrave's parents made him the weapon and then powered him up. To save his life arguably (he either doesn't see it that way, or at minimum refuses to give them even that much credit). But still, dysfunctional as hell.

"Fifty-first century?" Arched eyebrows. Had he been here just a week he would have scoffed at that. Now he takes Nautilus' choice in obnoxious song as actual prescience. Go figure.

Food and wine though, already better taste in everything than Jessica -- although hopefully with less drinking to the point of getting sick, AND less temper! -- but while the best of both was undoubtedly the Dream of All Blue, there's no way KG's going anywhere near there.

"Good, then you won't mind that robots do all the serving and automation." He actually hesitantly rubs the back of his neck. There is decent Italian... ish. But the robots make him nervous. Really anything out of his control tends to make him nervous -- but that is everything in Nautilus.

Messed up, dysfunctional and deranged. Their lives may have been similar, but the key differences were definitely noticeable... And that still didn't stop River from wanting to string him along for her own amusement. Kilgrave really has no idea what he's in for with her.

"Time travel is a wonderful thing and something I have a lot of experience with." She's been doing it her entire life.

Thankfully for him, River was very hard to get drunk and tended to not let herself go that far. It's only fun drinking someone under the table once or twice. Any more than that and it gets boring. However, if he ever found the right buttons, her temper was something that he might not survive, unless he could out run bullets if she ever got her hands on a gun.

"There's nothing wrong with robot servers." Obviously that didn't make her nervous in the slightest. Though, she was curious as to why it made him nervous. "Just so long as I have good company with me."

No no, he'd still enjoy that. Being used instead of being the user would still make him feel weirdly in control. Especially because of the contrast to how she is with the Doctor.

"Really," it sounds sarcastic and skeptical, and he can't help it. But this place is sort of time travel-y except... "Well, you're basically stuck here. Anyone who tells you, that you can go right back, is a liar." A quick eye roll. "Technically they say it's difficult if you have doubts about the reality of this place but..." he gestured with his hands. "Cultism. Scientology sounding to the Nth degree. I keep expecting Tom Cruise to jump out on people's couches and sofas." He was rather proud of that reference, although if she really was a time traveler, she might have no idea what it meant.

And Kilgrave always has shooty McAssassin ladies after him. Even in Nautilus, the first woman he freaked out to nearly shoot-on-sight levels was Kirika who literally was an assassin and one of the Doctor's 'daughters.' So.... there's that.

As dumb as it is, her latter suggestion warms him inside out. He KNOWS it's a line, he knows she probably literally doesn't mean HIM, but even that much kindness is so foreign to him, he genuinely enjoys it. So he ends up giving her a kind of dopey puppy dog smile, rubbing his thumbs over the top of her hands. "I'll endeavor to be just that."

It's weird. Not having his power. Normally he could just... order her to see him that way.

But he meant it when he told Jessica it was immensely unsatisfying. There was a lot to be said for pulling out the stops to please someone, even if they were thoroughly ungrateful -- as Jessie always was.

They were in for one interesting relationship dynamic, weren't they.

As for his reference, it goes right over her head because she is most definitely a time traveler and secondly, it's most definitely an American reference and she was never much for TV. Why watch the adventure when you could be having it?

Well, River could have been considered an assassin at one point and was a rather good shot even when she wasn't looking. Even if she didn't carry a gun anymore, she still kept her skills sharp just in case. Besides, even without a gun River is still very, very dangerous and clever.

And the moment she sees that dopey smile, she knows she has her hooks in him for good or bad... or until she gets bored. Either way, it will be an interesting experience. "I definitely hope so. Otherwise, I might just have to find someone else to appreciate my talents."

A billion percent, yes.

While Kilgrave was born and err... 'raised' in England -- as much as you can call it that, he only really started watching television when he came into his own and got freed from his parents' lab experiments. Yeah. Except when they let him watch rugby before that, to try to 'inspire' him to be strong and healthy and in their control. It's a thing.

Oh he can tell she's clever, and very strong. And lethal. If anything that's why he's doing all this. Kilgrave is well, none of that. Lethal... but usually his mode of offing people is just telling them to do it to themselves. Or others to do it.

He laughs at the last part, gently murmuring, "Heaven forbid. Unfortunately, you might find a dearth of that here too. Too many superhero teenagers running around." Oh, how he scoffs at that.

Considering her own..."childhood", River...well. Lets just go with the parts she remembers and leave it at that. Either way, it was a strange way to grow up. Who else can say they grew up being their parent's childhood friend.

In other words, he want's a strong, clever and very sexy on his side for protection. That might just be a double edge sword with River around.

"Are there now. Sounds rather annoying... it's more fun to cause the trouble than saving the day."

Kilgrave is all about double-edged swords. But he's never actually had his people used for protection used against him. Even to the point of hiring vast amounts of mercenary and protection agencies. Paranoia pays off.

AND HE BEAMS AT HER. The most genuine non-explicitly evil/creepy smile he's had in.... what feels like ages. Probably since the first time he realized he had more freedom than Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone.

"I quite agree!" he actually laughs at that, softly shaking his head, "No, the best part is later, when the papers are all baffled at how it all happened, or at the police station--" he grins slyly then, quieting himself down. He's paranoid about being recorded, and there's no telling what kind of traps he could be setting himself up for. He leans in wickedly instead, whispering in her ear once more, "Watch them scramble oh-so-fruitlessly, like helpless ants trying to repair their own hills while other chaos happens around them." He pulled back, eyes glittering well evilly, but with clear mirth. "I find the irony almost as delicious as Bucatini all’Amatriciana." He is way too proud of the way he says that.

Then the quicker he realizes she could both protect and kill him the better. Really, there was ever only one man that she would completely listen to and depending which version of him was there....Well. It's debatable whether or not she would listen to the younger versions of The Doctor at this point.

Though, paranoia could be good in small doses. If handled correctly.

As for his reaction to her words, she just keeps on smirking as he talks and honestly, her mind thinks of The Master briefly before brushing that thought away and admittedly, he did have a point. Watching people try and figure out how something happened or even the shock on their face when they realize she got away with some impossible feat... it was quite the wonderful look.

River can't help but chuckle. However where he seemed to be evil, she was more of a chaotic neutral... not so much evil now a days anyway. Thanks to her parents and The Doctor. "It is rather fun to see them scramble. Especially when you pull off something they think is absolutely impossible."

He already has. But that goes for most women. Well less so on the protection thing. But the Dragoon of darkness: Rose already wants to kill him so, there's that. He hasn't completely figured out you can come back from the dead here though. So there's that too.

"Which is everything. No imagination, the lot of them," he scoffed, completely ignoring how long it took him to stop treating Nautilus as a cultist camp that kidnapped him.

As far as River's concerned, Rose is harmless despite what the girl might think.

"Pity. Though that means I can get away with a lot more than I initially thought." And probably in more elaborate ways than usual if she really wanted. Then again....she would still have to be careful. There was no Doctor here that she trusted to catch her if she were to say... dive off of the 50th floor of a building or something insane like that.

No, no, different Rose. The darkness Rose has black hair, armor, and is training a darkness dragon that she used to chase Kilgrave up a tree. And all because he just ~~demanded~~ asked to be let inside!

"It's... different here," Kilgrave admitted rather ruefully. "Imagination is the least of the problems." Insanity was a bigger one in general, he felt.

Somehow, that sounds like a Rose she could get along with.

"Oh? Then what do you think the biggest problem is?" If he says insanity to her, she will laugh. River married arguably one of the most insane men in the whole universe and one could argue that she was hardly what one could call completely sane herself...

November & December Test Drive Meme

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Massive Jessica Jones spoilers \:|/

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