T-T-T-TEST DRIVE! Meme!

[thewakemods]

It's that time again!

→ Comment with a new character you'd like to test out in the game's setting. (put character/canon in subject line pls!)
→ You don't have to be in the game to comment! HI NEW PEOPLE LET US ENABLE YOU.
→ Tag around with new and old characters.
→ App all those characters
→ ???
→ PROFIT!

**NOTICE** - For new series and recent updates/occurrences to existing ones, please mark as SPOILERS if you must refer to such, but please use your own discretion in general.

Comments

[lightspeeddistraction]

W-Whoa whoa whoa, easy kiddo.

Your old man's not as hip to all of this magical warping and dimensional business as you are.

[Greg just hugs Steven a little tighter.]

Let's take a few breaths before you lay it all on me, huh?

[tigermillionaire]

[Oh man. It occurs to Steven how unequipped his dad is for this whole thing - Greg has always tried really hard to stay out of gem business unless he's needed, and he just doesn't have the context for this sort of stuff.

Steven pointedly takes a couple pointedly audible breaths to show that he's doing what his dad recommended, but doesn't really get...less stressed out.]

Um...It's...it's kind of a confusing story, even for me. [He swallows.] I've been here for weeks already, dad.

[lightspeeddistraction]

Weeks?!

But...But that's impossible! I just saw you!

[tigermillionaire]

Yeah, it's like...a timestream thing?

Garnet and Pearl have been here even longer. I don't really get it.

[Team Universe, not getting things.]

[lightspeeddistraction]

But that's...

Whoa.

Whoooaaaaaooookay.

[Just going to curl up now.]

[Because his mind.]

[tigermillionaire]

Dad! It's okay!

[Steven just sort of...flops onto him. Soothingly. Urgently soothing.]

It doesn't matter! But there's a lot of weird stuff here, so you need to be ready, okay?

[lightspeeddistraction]

[Greg rolls over onto his back, so now Steven is just flopped on his egregious dad belly.]

I dunno, son. This is kind of out of my jurisdiction. I mean...if you want to dial back on the high-end on some tasty jams, I'm your daddy-o but...

[tigermillionaire]

I know, but...

[He stares at Greg sadly over his belly bump.]

...I don't know if you can go home.

[lightspeeddistraction]

[Okay Greg has a very VERY noticeable moment of ABSOLUTE PANIC.]

Well...I mean...

[Then he looks at Steven. And he brings his hand up and places it on Steven's head.]

I guess I couldn't think of a better person to be stuck here with.

..A..And besides! This means we can go on tour together, right??

[tigermillionaire]

[Steven is almost confused for a second. Almost. But then that idea sinks in in a very serious way, and he goes from desperately worried to actually enthralled in the space of ten seconds. Even though his face is still wet with tears.]

...Oh my gosh...we totally could! You could do anything here!

[lightspeeddistraction]

Totally! We can reach for the stars and become them ourselves!

[No, Greg, that isn't what he meant--]

[tigermillionaire]

No, dad, really!

[THIS PART IS COOL OKAY.]

You can learn to do magic here!

[lightspeeddistraction]

Yoooouuuuu lost me, kiddo.

[tigermillionaire]

Everybody can! They call it bending, and everyone can do it if they learn! You like...can make anything, if you're good enough! And it's the only way that anybody has any powers here!

[lightspeeddistraction]

Oof...I dunno, son. Your old man can't bend like he used to...not since that summer in 83.

[tigermillionaire]

Not that kind of bending, dad!

[Steven laughs, and for what it's worth, he sounds a lot happier than he did a couple of minutes ago. He sits up on Greg's belly, smiling.]

It's like...bending reality! Like making stuff happen with your mind!

[lightspeeddistraction]

Iiiiiii'm not sure how comfortable I am with that kinda stuff, Steven.

Your old man's been around. Anything that can make you warp reality with your mind sounds like bad news bears.

[tigermillionaire]

[Okay, now it's Steven's turn to be confused.]

Huhh...what?

[lightspeeddistraction]

Nevermind, I think I'll leave the magic stuff to you, son.

But I'll be there! That's a plus, right?

[tigermillionaire]

[Steven kind of wants to argue with him - come on, it'll be fun! - but he doesn't. He figures he'll let his dad settle in a bit first. So instead he just sighs in relief.]

Yeah! I...I really missed you.

[He flops down again.]

I can't bend yet, either. Until I do, I can't use any of my other gem poewrs, either - but I'm not very good at it.

I did...kind of turn into a plant monster, though.

[lightspeeddistraction]

A plant monster?!

How?! Why?! Is this because you can't use your powers or something??

[tigermillionaire]

No...I think it was mostly unrelated.

Weird stuff just kind of happens here sometimes? They call them storms. It's just like all this random magic stuff happens all at once until it goes away!

You know...how the gem monsters used to be like people, right?

[lightspeeddistraction]

And this sorta stuff just happens?

Randomly??

Hooooh man. Alright. I am officially kind of completely unprepared for any of this.

Next you're going to tell me that giant robots are running around.

[tigermillionaire]

[UMMM...how to say this...]

His name's...Ultra Magnus...?

[lightspeeddistraction]

[GROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN]